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Episode 8
Brunhardt wanted to die.
In truth, he had wanted to die for a long time. Since the day he had to let go of Alicia with his own hands, he had no desire to live nor any will to go on.
'It’s time to end it.'
The only reason Brunhardt had not died and continued living was solely for his family, the Grizzly. It was because of the sin he committed out of arrogance.
He believed he could lift the curse upon the Grizzly. He thought he could prevent the calamities that befell them.
For thirty years, he failed to follow Alicia in death and devoted himself to his family and the empire.
He ventured alone to the west, a region shunned by other families, wielding his sword and drenching himself in the blood of enemies.
This was all to restore the prestige of the Grizzly, who were ostracized by society.
As a result, even with the disgrace of being labeled as cursed by the Evil God, the Grizzly managed to retain their place among the Great Five Families. Yet, Brunhardt's worn-out and weary soul found no salvation.
'Alicia….'
Now, at last, I’m coming to join you.
Brunhardt recalled the delicate and innocent face of his small and fragile daughter. Alicia, his daughter, had died at the age of nine, succumbing to the immense pain of a mana surge.
Brunhardt had been too arrogant and foolish to find a way to save his daughter.
'You never knew how to resent me despite it all.'
Brunhardt could still vividly recall the horrifying sensation of driving a blade into his daughter's small heart.
The feel of the blade tearing through her tender and soft flesh. Her lotus-like face, smiling to comfort her father, even as she cried.
"Lord Brunhardt, I have brought your daughter back!"
Many had claimed to help him find his daughter, who had been torn apart by mana and vanished. Mercenaries, information guilds, even priests of the temple had come to him with such claims.
The latest visitor after the mercenaries was a wandering priest from Solaris.
"Following Solaris’s guidance, I found this woman."
Brunhardt turned his head toward another woman pretending to be his daughter. Unlike the woman the mercenaries had brought earlier, her pretense was utterly unconvincing.
Her hair, dyed white, was patchy with black streaks, and her eyes, instead of being a deep violet like violets, were a pale lavender tinged with blue.
"Alicia."
Yet, like a fool, Brunhardt called out his daughter's name. Perhaps this whole charade was just an excuse to utter her name again.
Like a fool, he wanted to hope that she wasn’t truly dead.
Since her body was never found, he wanted to foolishly believe that maybe, just maybe, she was alive.
He clung to the promises of those who claimed they could bring her back, no matter how much time passed. Each lie, claiming to have found his daughter, never failed to stir a flicker of expectation in him.
And yet again, despair.
A profound sense of helplessness, as if the ground beneath him had disappeared, consumed him.
Brunhardt deeply felt the reality of his daughter's death every time someone falsely claimed to be Alicia. It felt like his entire being was being slashed by an icy, blade-like wind.
The vivid pain never diminished no matter how many times it repeated. Yet, it was only in those moments of intense agony that Brunhardt could breathe, even just a little.
Having failed to protect Alicia, he believed he deserved death. But since he dared to remain alive, he thought he ought to writhe in pain.
This was why Brunhardt kept searching for his lost daughter.
"Father, do you recognize me?"
Instead of answering the woman's question, he handed a pouch of money to the priest.
"She is not my daughter, but… Take her, clean her up, and feed her."
Despite the falsehood being exposed, the priest showed no surprise and quickly pocketed the money.
'He’s actually paying? I should look for another woman to pass off as his daughter.'
The priest smirked at the lucrative scam and left the inn with the woman.
Brunhardt had been giving large sums of money just for the promise of finding his daughter. Even when impostors were brought to him, he still offered payment.
It was no wonder that his surroundings were swarming with con artists, as people believed he had lost his grip on reality due to the horrors of war.
This was how Brunhardt viewed his situation, but not how Letty saw it.
✦ ✦ ✦
"No way, this old man’s completely out of it. How many times has he been scammed? Is he insane?"
Tinker muttered quietly, observing Brunhardt from a hidden corner of the inn.
Letty shot a glare at the fairy, but the fairy stubbornly continued its argument.
"He keeps throwing money at people even though he knows they’re frauds. If that’s not crazy, what is it?"
What a waste of money. If he has that much to spare, he should do charity work—or better yet, give it to me!
Recalling the pouch of money the so-called priest had just run off with, the fairy patted Letty's shoulder encouragingly.
"Why don’t we just claim we found his daughter too?"
"Stop saying such wicked things!"
Letty swatted at Tinker, as though trying to shoo away a devil whispering bad ideas into her ear.
"Did you just shoo me away?"
Tinker was taken aback as Letty, who usually addressed the fairy with kindness, suddenly glared daggers at it.
"How could you treat me like this? I’m hurt."
"You keep telling me to do bad things."
Even though she needed money, Letty couldn’t bring herself to deceive Brunhardt.
As long as the person he was waiting for was his daughter, she could never do it.
'My mother used to wait for me like that….'
Letty recalled the story of her mother, which was mentioned in the book the fairy had shown her.
Her mother had been deceived multiple times by Feyrin's lies, each time claiming that Letty was still alive.
Feyrin had manipulated her mother, using promises of reuniting with Letty to make her endure harsh tasks.
'My mom was really smart, but even she got tricked by Feyrin.'
That was because Feyrin had exploited Letty. No parent wants to believe their child is truly gone.
Recalling the book’s contents weighed heavily on her chest, as if a boulder was pressing down on her.
Letty pressed her reddened eyes with her small fists and approached Brunhardt.
"Grandpa."
"…You."
Brunhardt's expression darkened upon seeing Letty.
His gaze seemed to ask why she hadn’t left even after he gave her money. The child bit her small, trembling lips in response.
"Why. Have you come to find my daughter too?"
Brunhardt asked in a low voice. Letty narrowed her eyes sharply at him.
But her sharp gaze only came across as cute and small, making Brunhardt let out a stunned, amused laugh.
"Why are you glaring at me like that?"
"Grandpa, you’re such a fool."
At Letty's blunt remark, Brunhardt nodded slowly.
He admitted to being a fool. He was foolish and incapable, unable to protect his one and only daughter.
"I am a fool. Just earlier, I let myself get swindled by that fake priest."
Even with his acknowledgment, Letty wasn’t satisfied.
In the dim light of the yellow lamp, his broad shoulders appeared especially forlorn and pitiful.
"Grandpa, if your daughter knew you were like this, she’d be heartbroken."
"How would you know that?"
"It’s true. She’d be so sad, she’d cry rivers of tears."
Having read the parts about her mother being deceived by Feyrin, Letty felt as if her entire heart was being torn apart.
She felt pity and regret for her mother, and an intense hatred for Feyrin for deceiving her.
"She’d feel sorry for you, Grandpa."
"Why would my daughter feel sorry for me? She’s done nothing wrong."
The one who was in the wrong was Brunhardt himself.
"She wouldn’t feel sorry because she did something wrong."
Letty shook her head vehemently and continued.
"She’d feel sorry because she loves you. Because she loves you so much, it hurts her to see you in pain."
"…....…."
"So don’t hurt anymore. Don’t suffer. Your daughter would want to tell you that."
If even Grandpa couldn’t understand her feelings, who else would?
"And Grandpa, Letty will definitely find your daughter."
Really, I will. I’ll find her, just like I’ll find my mom and your daughter.
For some reason, Brunhardt felt a peculiar sense of comfort at Letty's whispered words. It was strange.
Though no one knew better than he did that Alicia was gone, this little child made him feel as though she could truly find his daughter.
"So stop being such a fool now."
"…Alright. Thank you."
Pat-pat.
Lessy stroked Brunhardt's head as if he were a child she was proud of.
She also patted his tired and weary old hands.
Only after the little girl dangled from his massive shoulders and hugged him tightly did Brunhardt shed silent tears.
Letty pretended not to notice his tears.
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